Why I Wore Purple On October 20th: A Letter to my Future Children

Wearing purple to support the LGBT community.

Dear Future Children,

I may not know you yet, and there is always the chance I may never be able to meet you. To raise you, to love you, to have you in my life.  However, these are my promises to you:

I promise to never to inflict strict gender roles on you at such a young age.  If you're a boy and you want to run around in a pink princess dress and play with dolls I will encourage you to express yourself.  If you're a girl and you want to play in the dirt and wear mismatched camo I will encourage you to express yourself.  If you're a boy who wants to act like a 'boy' or a girl who wants to act like a 'girl' I will happily encourage you. Regardless of your gender I will let you express yourself the way you feel you should express yourself.  I will let you grow and be nurtured in a home where gender is fluid, not concrete.

If you start telling me that you don't feel like fit into your body.  That it doesn't match the way you feel inside. That your physical gender doesn't match your inner gender. I will do my best to make sure that one day you will be comfortable and love who you are.  If that requires therapy to help with transition, hormones to help your body, or surgery to make sure everything matches the way you feel inside, or legal proceedings to change your name.  Whatever it may be I will do everything to help you transition into a body that matches how you feel you are, inside.  And when it's all done we will have a birthday party, on the date of your choice, to celebrate the beautiful and amazing person you've always been. And we will, as a family and community, celebrate this birthday (along with your physical birthday whenever that may be), every year.

If you're a boy who finds himself more attracted to the prince, or a girl who finds herself wanting a princess of her very own I will not do anything about it.  Because there is nothing wrong with you.  As you grow up and your start feeling these attractions grow stronger and stronger I will not do anything about it.  Because still there is nothing wrong with you.  If you're a teenager and you're fully aware that you're gay and come out I will do something about it.  I will throw you a huge coming out party.  Complete with cake, streamers, balloons, friends and family. Because, obviously, there is still nothing wrong with you.  We will be celebrating your coming out with love, because I am tired of sad coming out stories.  And if your school tells you can't bring your boyfriend or girlfriend as your date to prom you'll know that I'll have your back and stand up for your rights.  And if you're being bullied I will do everything in my power to put those bullies in their place. And if your school does nothing about bullying I will take you out and find you a new school with a community that will love and accept you for who you are, not who you kiss.

If you have a friend who is LGBT and is disowned by their family because of it.  Kicked out of their home and deserted.  I promise to take them in and love them as my own child.  I promise to take care of them.  I promise to make sure they get the help and support they need.  I promise to stand up to their family and show them what unconditional love is really all about.

I promise to always stand up for you.  Whether it be at Thanksgiving dinner, or in the PTA, or school board, or the local, state, or national government arenas.  I promise to stand up for your rights, for your safety.  You will always come first.

If anybody threatens your safety in anyway, God help them they better get over their homophobia or transphobia before I go all Mama Bear on them.

I promise to raise you in a spiritual community where you're taught that God made you the way you are.  That you're not a mistake, or making a choice.  If it turns out that love isn't their strong suit we will find another community.  And if you grow up and decide that God isn't good for you, that you can be good without God (which, you can be) that will be perfectly fine with me.  Just as long as you come home for Passover. And Rosh Hashanah. And Yom Kippur.  And Sukkot. And Chanukah. And Purim.  There isn't in any atheistic or agnostic handbooks that says you can't come over for fine family dinner on those certain days.

I promise to always love you.  I promise to always make sure you're happy, safe, nurtured, cared for, and protected.

I promise to give you a better world.  A safer world. A world filled with love, joy, triumph, courage, integrity, bliss, and acceptance.  An exciting world filled with amazing people all waiting to know and love you as much as I will.  I am so excited for you to fall in love with whom ever you love.

Love Always,

Mom